Can it really have been August 2014 since the last SLIFR movie quiz? An embarrassed look back at the virtual calendar confirms this amazing factoid, and before that one there was a wind-swept, tumbleweed-thick dead zone in between Professor Dewey Finn's outing and the one before that. So, before the student body starts getting restless and demanding some real return on their tuition investment, we here at SLIFR University feel that it’s time to get off the schneid and get back to the fevered pace of full-tilt cinemacademia. (Why did typing out that newly coined word make me suddenly thirsty?)And who better to end this particular drought than that tall, cool drink of water from the bad side of the tracks, the one teacher on the staff guaranteed to make the class sit up straight, if only to make driving her stiletto heel through the top of the distracted student’s foot just that much easier? Yes, we welcome SLIFR U’s favorite substitute professor, low on positive teaching philosophy but high on shitty attitude, the Bad Teacher herself, Ms. Elizabeth Halsey, to introduce SLIFR movie quiz #24, her very own Rotten Apple, Hot for Teacher Summer Movie Quiz.
Ms. Halsey may not have your best educational interests at heart—she’s more likely to be caught staring out the window than even that distracted student with the perforated hoof. But one thing is for sure—she will keep the test-taking process lively. And she will take no shit from you clowns either, so keep your heads down and offer it not. Just remember the golden rules of SLIFR quiz taking and you will incur neither her wrath nor a bad grade:1) Be sure to cut and paste the questions into the comments column and write your answers below them. This way, Ms. Halsey will be able to follow which question you are answering and you will be able to avoid her crumpling up your test form and lighting it on fire in the middle of her desk.
And 2) Be sure to be as long-winded and loquacious as the spirit doth move thee, for such logorrhea tends to make for better answers. It also increases the chances that she’ll fall asleep while grading your paper, thus allowing you to sneak out of class early while she snores it up at the front of the room.So, if you’re ready, Ms. Halsey, heels sharpened and at the ready, has given us the go-ahead. Get out your blue books, raise your #2s, bite the big apple (don’t mind the maggots), and let’s get started!
1) Name a line from a movie that should've become a catch phrase but didn't *2) Your second favorite William Wellman film
3) Viggo Mortensen or Javier Bardem?4) Favorite first line from a movie
5) The most disappointing/superfluous “director’s cut” or otherwise extended edition of a movie you’ve seen? *
6) What is the movie you feel was most enhanced by a variant version? *7) Eve Arden or Una Merkel?
8) What was the last DVD/Blu-ray/streaming film you saw? The last theatrical screening?9) Second favorite Michael Mann film
10) Name a favorite director’s most egregious misstep11) Alain Delon or Marcello Mastroianni?
12) Jean-Luc Godard famously stated that “all you need for a movie is a girl and a gun.” Name one other essential element that you’d add to the mix.13) Favorite one-sheet that you own, or just your favorite one-sheet (please provide a link to an image if you can)
14) Catherine Spaak or Daniela Giordano?15) Director who most readily makes you think “Whatever happened to…?”
16) Now that some time has passed… The Interview, yes or no?17) Second favorite Alberto Calvalcanti film
18) Though both displayed strong documentary influence in their early films, Wim Wenders and Werner Herzog have focused heavily on the documentary form late in their filmmaking careers. If he had lived, what kind of films do you think Rainer Werner Fassbinder, their partner in the German New Wave of the ‘70s, would be making now?19) Name a DVD you’ve replaced with a Blu-ray. Name another that you decided not to replace. *
20) Don Rickles or Rodney Dangerfield?21) Director who you wish would hurry up and make another film
22) Second favorite Michael Bay film23) Name a movie that, for whatever reason, you think of as your own
24) Your favorite movie AI (however loosely you care to define the term)25) Your favorite existing DVD commentary track *
26) The double bill you’d program on the last night of your own revival theater27) Catherine Deneuve or Claudia Cardinale?
(* Questions provided by long-time SLIFR reader and quiz participant Robert Fiore. Thanks, Bob!)
And as special bonus extra credit, to commemorate 10 years of movie quiz-taking fun, here’s a compulsively clickable look back at the 23 quizzes that preceded this one-- A COMPLETIST’S GUIDE TO 10 YEARS OF THE SERGIO LEONE AND THE INFIELD FLY RULE QUIZZES
PROFESSOR WAGSTAFF’S SUMMER OF 42 (QUESTIONS, THAT IS) MOVIE QUIZ and follow-ups: Part 1
PROFESSOR VAN HELSING’S JUST-BEFORE-SUNRISE WOODEN-STAKE-THROUGH-SPRING-BREAK MOVIE QUIZ and a follow-up
PROFESSOR JULIUS KELP’S ENDLESS SUMMER CHEMISTRY TEST
PROFESSOR IRWIN COREY’s FOREMOSTLY AUTHORITATIVE SPRING BREAK MOVIE QUIZ and follow-ups: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
PROFESSOR KINGSFIELD’S HAIR-RAISING, BAR-RAISING HOLIDAY MOVIE QUIZ, plus a follow-up
PROFESSOR SEVERUS SNAPE’S SORCERER-TASTIC, MUGGALICIOUS MID-SUMMER MOVIE QUIZ and a follow-up
DR. ANTON PHIBES’ ABOMINABLY ERUDITE, MUSICALLY MALIGNANT, CURSEDLY CLEVER HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIE QUIZ
PROFESSOR ARTHUR CHIPPING’S MADDENLY DETAILED, PURPOSEFULLY VAGUE, FITFULLY OUT-OF-FOCUS BACK TO SCHOOL MOVIE QUIZ and a follow-up
MISS JEAN BRODIE’S MODESTLY MAGNIFICENT, MATRIARCHALLY MANIPULATIVE SPRINGTIME-FOR-MUSSOLINI MOVIE QUIZ, and follow-ups:Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
PROFESSOR LARRY GOPNIK’S POST-HANUKAH, PRE-CHRISTMAS, POST-SCHROEDINGER, PRE-APOCALYPSE SLIFR HOLIDAY MOVIE QUIZ
PROFESSOR DEWEY FINN’S OSTENTATIOUSLY ODD, SCHOLASTICALLY SCATTERSHOT BACK-TO-SCHOOL (OF ROCK?) MOVIE QUIZ