PROFESSOR VAN HELSING COPS OUT

As readers who remember the first “Mr. Hand” quiz from last year know, in the wake of each successive quiz the professor in question has taken the answers, broken them down into a digestible format and highlighted some of what he thought were the best, most provocative, well-written or downright odd answers. But a funny thing happened on the way to the roundup for Professor Van Helsing’s Just-Before-Sunrise Wooden-Stake-Through-Spring-Break Quiz— the professor’s little academic exercise got noticed by some pretty high-profile sites. Thanks to Jim Emerson, Shawn Levy, Anne Thompson and a plug by a little mom-and-pop shop called the Internet Movie Database over the long Memorial Day Weekend, the good professor ended up logging 107 comments under the post—easily a SLIFR record-- and 92 actual responses to the quiz itself! (And that’s not counting my own long-winded entry.)

As more and more time passed and more and more folks dropped in to post their two cents, it became clearer and clearer to Professor Van Helsing that he just wasn’t going to have the time to devote to a proper roundup in the fashion of his predecessors, so overwhelmed was he by responsibilities outside the SLIFR university curricula and the realization that so many people would care to take considerably more than just a moment to offer their own contributions, many of which obviously took a lot of effort and thought to compose.

In lieu of an actual roundup, the professor thought that, rather than eschew the process altogether, it might be best just to offer individual thanks to everyone who participated in this past spring’s little party as a prelude to the next quiz. And I heartily agreed. So now, speaking for Professor Van Helsing, I’d like to offer my sincerest thanks (in the order in which their responses were received) to the following good folks for stopping by, making themselves at home, devoting some time to the professor’s enterprise, and indulging in a bit of the spirit in which it was intended—that is, one of serious fun:

Roscoe
John T. Chance
That Little Round-Headed Boy
Flickhead
Goatboy
Peter Nellhaus
Blaaagh
Stanley Kubrick
Machine Gun McCain
Paul C.
Edward Copeland
Brian
Lucas
Jen
Beege
Sharon
Steve
Red
Mr. Middlebrow
Achillea
Martin
Thom McGregor
Dan Aloi
Murray
K. Lindbergs
akstanwyck
LG
Sam
Blake
Ken Lowery
Cerulean Lily
Agape
Cubbies
Eliz
Terminal
dritchie
Danel Griffin
Robert Hubbard
pajamadancing
Christoph Selzer
David_Theis
Jaskin
The Mysterious Adrian Betamax
Mikefooord
Teabo
Apathygrrrl
Dr. Astronaut Body
Justin
Boy&Horse
Chris Oliver
Yojiro
The Sixth Beatle
Burtoniac
Liam Harrison
Jdobbs
Jack
Marcus Demmon
Joel
Mike Weber/Fairport Fan
Nicholas Julian
Zack
Captain Fantastic
Nomadic Simes
Fanboy 37
Uncle Duke
Cashew
Michael (Houston, TX)
Mort Shelby
Charles Savoy
Lons
masonfisk
red felidae
M.L.
Bemis
Seth Gordon
lisa
rachel
Sal
and 14 souls who shall remain known to us only as “Anonymous”

Professor Van Helsing thanks you all again for taking the time to be part of his quiz and hopes at least some of you will be back when the next faculty member steps up to the podium.

And I have it on very good authority that the faculty member in question has completed the next quiz and will be unveiling it before the long July 4 weekend comes to a close. So I hope your typing fingers have had an adequate rest. They’ll be put through the ringer yet again starting in just a matter of days. Thanks for stopping by, and for staying tuned.